So, my oldest has taken up wrestling this year. Now, where I grew up, this was not a sport (unless you were referring to Hulk Hogan and drove a monster truck and chewed and spat into a used soda bottle). The hard part for me is that I don't know if he gets the sport at all. This is his first foray into actual competitive sports. He has done sports camps and "in-house" soccer programs, but never been on display in the public forum before. Wrestling is such an individual sport too. You and the other guy on the mat, 3, 1 minute periods, and it's on. The first match I expected tears. None, despite him being pinned repeatedly and not moving. The second, he did okay. The third, a little better. But this weekend (he had two matches) was brutal to watch.
Saturday, he had an 8 am match Daddy was to take him too. Of course, I get a call 10 minutes after 8 that Daddy didn't bring the bag with his water and snack. So, I packed up the other two and went over. This match was last minute and, therefore, half the team didn't come. He was wrestling kids easily 10-15 pounds heavier and with at least 1 or more years experience. The buzzer would sound and he'd be pinned flat to the floor in under 10 seconds. Typically, we call him "The Joker" b/c he grins all the time despite his inability on the floor. Even the coach comments on how "joyous" he seems out there. By the end, though, he wasn't smiling.
I know it's part of the game and I want my kids to know that "you win some, and lose some", but a win now and then could help. I have a really hard time detaching myself from the emotions of being the crappy athlete as a child, the last one picked, the one who cried and gave up often b/c I didn't know how to handle failure. I give my son huge props b/c he has never refused to go out on that mat and has never shed a tear. But, I almost wish he would. The coach commented that one day his aggression will come out and he'll get the knack for it. He claims his own son was the same way for the first two years he wrestled as well. I just wish it wasn't my kid.
Sunday, he had another match and this time it was just me with him. He admitted in the car on the way to church that he felt like every other kids was better, even the other first years. How do you prove to him otherwise? I could tell at the match that his heart wasn't in it. He basically was getting pinned and staying down. He knows how to bridge and roll and try to escape for the msot part, but he wasn't doing it. He wasn't smiling either. During his last matach I could see him doing the small little breaths we all take when we don't want to cry and are fighting back those tears. It is really hard to watch. I don't know how to help him.
I know he is listening to the the coaches and learning the moves b/c he comes home after practice and walks us through them. He just doesn't know how to apply it under pressure. How do you teach a kid that? We have one more match this weekend at home. Then, an actual tournament where the kids can win medals and trophies. The coach says the kids will actually be ranked and matched according to size, skill and experience. I hope so.
I can't watch my kids heart break anymore.
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